Know that I was never pleased in seeing you suffer.
The carriage rocked steady, the wheels bounced off one another from side to side; from my heart to yours, yours to mine. Your hands were always warm, eyes always bright, even in the cold.
Two candles were lit for every night, one for you and one for me. They took control of the time we had. As they dwindled, our time dissolved into the past. We exchanged glances, deep stares trying to read each others thoughts. As the wax dripped it measured the minutes rolling softly away from us. Our love grew in the beaming light, burning away the secretive shadows that outlined our relationship. As the candle vanished, you would go.

My heart bounced from one rib to another, creating an internal melody. The flame sang that same song and the wax did not melt. It took a stand for our love and refused to bow down to the construct of time. The sun revolved around us yet we stayed still. In that moment the world did not want us to part. But just as the moon controls the tides of the world, there were outside forces controlling us. It was inevitable. I never dreamt of the day, I dreaded it with every pleasant word I falsely wrote. I never believed it would come. It is selfish, I know, and I am ashamed but I would rather that the war go on and see turmoil in my surroundings if only I could have stayed with you a little longer. You were all I wanted.

I tried to see the stars through the falling snow but the frost bit my face and I could no longer look up, drawn to your eyes I found warmth only in them. The future was so far away, I wanted to be in that moment forever. Holding hands, wrapped together not only by fibers and threads of cloth to shelter from the cold but also by light, spindles of energy entangling our emotions, wound around our bodies. We were blind of any doubt. We could not see that someday soon someone would come between us. I would not have survived without you during that time, but I understand why you left.

Fixing this would be like gluing a portion of sand back into the ceramic chalice it once was.
I’ve tried to find each granule in the desert.
Through hopelessness, I strived to search for each missing spec,
but a storm blew all of the pieces in different directions.
Alone, I traveled, still looking.
Famished in despair with broken breaths of air.
Fallen at your feet, still you don’t seem to care.
I stand, move forward, choking as I sift the sand.
Cold eyes stare as I fight to bring it back together.
Under your glare, I stack the grains.
Squinting into the sunlit grit, eyes burning with pain.
Still you bend back my scrambling fingers in disdain.
Emotions beginning to wane,
heartbreak stain bleeding through to my seeding mind.
Finding doubt in each fleck of sun-drenched rock.
I lost myself in the particles flicked behind.
Searching for meaning in a meaningless void,
while you enjoyed watching as I unearthed everything you had already destroyed.

The chalice was meant to share with you.
Malice ruined the chance.
Hope did not relent as I balanced on a thin wire of love and hate.
You shook the wire to watch me fall;
caught in your arms, reassured, you set me back upon the wire only to shake it again.
If I allow this to go on, my fate will match the chalice,
broken into a fine dust blowing across the desert crust.